My Jerry Springer marriage

Closing our first date, my ex-wife told me that I was a step up from her current boyfriend. We had talked for a week prior to the date and she never mentioned a boyfriend. I was used to hand me downs and did not think I deserved any better, so I opted to stay. I did not listen to that voice inside and run away.

I got her out of debt and married her. I got us a house. I was working my butt off. She made fun of me because I had a name tag on my work attire. Her sisters, brother, and brothers-in-law were doctors, computer experts, and other upwardly mobile workers. So I went to college to get a degree in business. And kept my 90 Hour Work Week.

She woke me up one morning crying. I asked what was the matter. She said, and I quote, ""I'm sorry. I'm pregnant. I did not mean to." I did not understand those words until years later when she told me that my son was not my biological son. Again, I did not listen to those voices and run away. Three times in the next 6 years you reminded me that he was not my biological son. I did not care. I loved him like he was mine. And I still do.

She admitted to me that she was a sex addict and had slept with 16 guys since we got married. She said some people do not steal for the monetary value but for the thrill of getting away with it. She said that's why she was cheating on me. The thrill of wondering if I would catch her made the sex better. The proverbial forbidden fruit.

And every day she told me she loved me. Every year she bought me a card and told me she loved me. All the while, she was having affairs. 11 years of lies, deceit,  and using her new knowledge of psychology to break me down. I will never trust anyone again. I will never open up to anyone ever again.

I asked her to stop. She said no. She was in love with her current fling. This is the Jerry Springer cherry on top. He was in his forties and married. He was cheating on his wife with a 17 year old that was married to a soldier in Indiana. At the same time he was cheating on his wife with my wife. My ex-wife even posed as a bridesmaid when the 40 year old man married to 17 year old girl.

She committed perjury four or five times in the divorce trial, claiming that she had no relationship with the man she is married to now. Her student of psychology. If there was ever a female narcissist, she is one. And so is her boy toy.

And they continue to lie about it to this day. Because she was his supervisor in studying Clinical Psychology and they would both lose their licenses. Their supervisor even warned them to be careful. But psychology doesn't care about adultery. Psychology is the liberal arts of placing the blame on others. 

And people wonder why I want nothing to do with Humanity anymore.

All of her letters, notes and flirtatious emails with her lover will be included in my book.

All I wanted was my son. Blood or not, he was my son. Blood or not, he is my son.

My white privilege

 I want to tell you the story have a little white boy that seems to have misplaced his privilege. That little white boy is a grown man now. He doesn't want your pity. He wants you to leave him the f*** alone. There is a rage inside of him every day that he has to fight to quell. You would never physically hurt another human. But he is still very self-destructive. Why? Because he does not want anyone else to feel when he has felt. That he is me.

When I was 8 years old, I was molested and sodomized by 2 black boys that were three or four years older than me. The adults that I talked to about the incident, told me not to tell my parents. The attackers' older brother was the star of the high school football team. They also told me that my dad would probably beat someone half to death and end up in jail. So I shut up. I had nightmares and still do. I tried to drown myself in a swimming pool a year later. Unfortunately, the Red Cross girl found me floating in the water. I wish I would have died right there.

A few months before I turned 10, we moved on to a Native American reservation. The day we arrived, the talk around the village was that of a white man who had his genitalia cut off and stuck in his mouth and his throat cut. They found him less than three miles from where I was going to be going to school. I got the shit kicked out of me every day. They used to hold me down and they would hold me down and grind their heels into my hands. They would choke me until I passed out. They hated me because I was white. They did unspeakable things to me. They threatened to kill my younger brothers if I did not do what they said. I did that homework. I let them win at things I could have easily won. I stole for them, to lessen my beatings.

I just want to know where the f*** the white privilege is in any of that. I could easily be a racist, but I'm not. I hate everyone. The entire human race. I look forward to the day it destroys itself.

There's a lot more to the story. You would not believe it. I'm tired of the lies, deceased, distrust, use, abuse, and hatefulness of humanity. Humanity is dead. 

I just want to be left alone.

2022 midterms versus the Delta variant

It appears the progressive liberals will stop at nothing. They will kill half the population and destroy the country before they ever allow a conservative to run it again.

The closer we get to the 2022 midterm elections, the more and more they are pushing another stay-at-home mandate. Mail-in voting. Then they can cheat again they can steal the 2022 midterms. Just like they did the 2020 election.

If we allow them to take over the country, we will never get it back. Never. We need to stand up now. We need to demand recounts in every state. This is not about race, religion, sex, or creed. This is about saving the greatest nation on the planet. It is time for America to stand up. Live on your feet or die on your knees.

The government is lying to you. You've become too soft, lazy, and fat to see. It's not you destroying the planet. It's them. You are just slaves to the grind. Flocks of birds and swarms of bees do not just fall from the sky. It's not insects killing them. Its 4G and 5G radio waves all over the world. They acted just like a microwave. They're killing the birds and the bees and they're heating up the planet. Don't trust me or take my word. Do your own research.

"Do the math," says the political affiliation that claim dictator Biden got more votes than Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama. Lies. Lies. Lies.

"Trust the science," says the political affiliation that claims there are over 200 different genders. Science says there are two genders. Male and female. Everything else is a mutation, abnormality, or aberration.. And also claims that a mask that stops particles larger than 20 microns will stop a virus smaller than .14 to .6 microns in size. More lies.

Jeffrey Epstein did not kill himself. President Trump did not collude with China and Russia. Hunter Biden, Joe Biden, Hillary Clinton, Barack Obama and the rest of the current Administration are guilty of what they accused President Trump of.

The January 6th 2021 incident at the Capitol was staged by the progressive liberals. Two of the alleged "insurrectionists" are members of the Philadelphia BLM. Don't trust me. Do your research.

If you get a vaccine, you don't have to wear a mask. More lies. If you get a vaccine, you're protected from covid-19. More lies. If you don't get a vaccine, you're not American and don't love anyone. That's a lie. Trust your body. I know many people who contracted covid-19 six months before it was allegedly in America. They are fine. They got sick and got over it. That's what the human body does. To hell with them and their vaccine. And they can take their microchip and stick it where the sun don't shine. Don't trust me. Do your research.

Isn't it odd that the FDA is dragging their feet on federally approving the vaccine? Isn't it odd that the three men that have the patent on the vaccine also have the patent on the virus? Bill Gates, George Soros, and dr. Fauci. Don't trust me. Do your own research.

There are three books you should read right now. Every stinking one of you. You're not doing anything else. Sitting at home, drawing that government check. Here's three little books you should read.

George Orwell - 1984

Ayn Rand - Anthem

Ray Bradbury - Fahrenheit 451

After reading these three books you will have a new perspective on what's going on. We were warned. As late as Dwight Eisenhower, we were warned about the military industrial complex. Be afraid. Be very afraid. But be ready to stand up and fight for what is yours. Freedom is not free. What better way to die than to give your life to ensure a pure and clean future for our children?

And who remembers in January of 2020 when President Trump tried to shut down flights to and from China, Nancy Pelosi called him a xenophobe. She went to Chinatown, danced in the streets and told people to come on down. They wanted this virus so they could shut everybody down and force mail-in voting. It made it so much easier for the progressive liberals to usher in socialism and eventually a new world order. 

It's all about subjugation. It's all about control. It's all about dominance and submission.

Happy Birthday Byron Alexander

Happy 19th birthday. I would say that it seems like yesterday that you were born, but that would not be true. The last 13 years have been torturous and never-ending. 

Your mother chose another man over me. You're old enough now to know the truth. I just hope that the womanizing coward, that was married and cheated on his wife with a seventeen-year-old and your mother at the same time, has treated you well. My hands were tied. I have never stopped thinking of you or loving you. That is why I stayed away. One day you will understand. Take care of yourself and avoid self-destructive habits. I know your mother and her lover are alcoholics just like her parents are or were. I know she and her lover are both Pill Poppers. That is one reason she pushed me away. Because I condemned the actions.

I still have copies of all of her letters and journals to prove everything I have said. Even the courts said they knew that I was not the bad person in this, but their hands were tied.

Art

A poem does not have to rhyme. Ask Charles Bukowski. A song does not have to maintain a certain rhythm. Ask Neil Peart. A painting does not have to be geometrically perfect. Ask Salvador Dali. Don't be afraid to stray from the norm. Art has no boundaries. Just create.